Getting in the Way
A friend of mine recently observed that when it comes to my experiences in fetish, or my lack of experiences as it has become more obvious that it is, it is myself that blocks my own happiness. I don’t know how many times I have let myself stop with doing something or avoid doing something completely just because of a momentary discomfort. I hate that I let myself do this. I hate that I don’t experience things because I have let my own fears control my life.
I feel like there are so many (erotic) goals that I haven’t accomplished because I have either been personally afraid of how I might react, or because of a feeling, or worse yet, because of what someone else in my life might think.
I make bad decisions sometimes when I am sexually excited, decisions I often regret later, almost instantly, but I am starting to realize that those decisions might not be so bad. They are based on my inner most desires which I have always denied myself the ability to experience. I need to break through everything pre-concieved and go back to the beginning of experience, dropping things like “I dont like” and “I dont do”, starting fresh and just going with my feelings. The cock can’t be wrong all the time, but an overly protective conscious mind can ruin all of the fun in life.